Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Finals Week 4. The awards night.

"Well I'll be buggered," the words of president Phil Payne certainly rang true, even if he was smiling when he said it. It was certainly the second best speech of the night, after the two time Jack Scott Medal winner from Singleton's prepared speech. In the second tie for the week, Tom Shannon, Dan Keival, and Moese M all took home the major award. Apparently, Shannon could have wrapped the award up for himself after the last round fixture after being best on the ground, however the referee in charge deemed he was not the fairest so was awarded no points.

Shannon probably deserved the medal outright and my sympathy goes out to him. Not only for the referee's inept decision at the end of the year, more because he is bald at such a young age. It was clear that his backside got all his hair when he proceeded to do naked push ups toward the end of the night in the starlight room. It has now been renamed to the Starfish room.

This also begs to ask the question, should the NHRU look at a different point scoring system, where they combine the referees points with opposition coaches or captains. Not taking anything away from the winners of the medal, but for two many years, teams from lower performing clubs have featured in the medal race at the end of the year. The trophy which awards the spread of medal points to the club with the highest amount was also drawn with Merewether and Wanderers. Jim Thiveos' cousin from Wanderers, dressed as a bus conductor was the highlight of my night.

Coach of the year, Blubba Coleman was graceful in accepting his "popularity award." Speaking to him, he was a little embarrassed and said in his own words that Aaron Thompson should have won the award. Maybe the referees should vote on this award instead as Coleman certainly wouldn't have won it for the second year in a row. Personally I would have like to have seen former NSW origin candidate Steve "the Swede" Dunstan take home the award. Just for the Bay to have such a high calibre coach on their side to guide them to last was a feat in itself.

Awards night's are usually pretty boring affairs, but general manager, Fenton' Couhl's speech certainly livened things up at the end. Thanking more people than Luke Kermode, Fenton's professionalism was on full show and he certainly wasn't "buggered" by any means. I would personally like to thank him for including me in the media which he thanked. Hopefully one day I can get a mug like Mike Rabbit, who is apparently also available for debutant balls and barmitsfa's.

Moving on to the business end of my column, I now present you with the first annual "Hornet Hive Achievement Awards."

The Luke Troy Self Improvement Award - Named after the king of self improvement this award is presented to Monty Simes. He wins the award after a nomination from his brother Dorian. Dorian tells me Monty wants to move out of the Wanderers club and play for either Merewether or Uni next year. For everyone this side of glebe rd, lets hope its uni. He is the standout candidate for self improvement, maybe he'll change that pompous name of his too.

The Tim Chidgy Level 2 coach of the year - Tim wanted to award this trophy to himself. The hornet had to remind him that he didn't actually have the qualifications to win the award. the award then went to Kurt Banks of Merewether's 5th grade. With probably the toughest job in getting a full team on the park each week, Banks has once again made the GF with his team of lower grade has beens. Its hard being at the bottom when 6 grades are on top.

The Newcastle Wildfires Team of the year - In a toss up between Southern Beaches, Wanderers and Merewether Carlton, Merewether win by a nose. Thus far they have won the big games, but have to prove it in the big one. Wanderers look like a team in turmoil at the moment, with no no. 10 to take them home. Southern Beaches will improve next year and make the semi finals. However, Merewether win hands down.

The Hornet Hive Player of the Year - This was taken from a poll of coaches who mattered at last nights medal night. Most coaches agreed Jay Strachan was the flashiest in the comp, Tom Shannon the most bald and versatile, and Dan Keival the most intimidating and stupid, however all agreed that,"that Merewether Breakaway" was easilly the most dominating in the competition. All coaches found him impossible to plot against and he has carried Merewethers chances through the second half of the season. Most said the biggest problem was they didn't know who he was. The former fullback who couldn't see, the man who can fix your irrigation as well as your breakdown is the inaugural winner of the Hornet hive player of the Year - Adam Princehorn.

Feel free to add awards or comments as to who you believe are the better players or teams. Yes, Merewether has dominated the first annual awards, but 6 grades gives them the kudos to do so.

44 comments:

  1. You are a wanker. this is the most biased article you have written. What about the sherwoods, or Wells from Hamilton. Keval is easilly the best player in the comp though. Maybe you should win your own award for worst rugby writer in town, you biased heap of crap.

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  2. kurt banks is also a top root (for a bloke)

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  3. anonymous - what did you expect coming onto the Green Hornets website - praise for the poons?

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  4. Another example of a Poon taking themselves way to seriously, It's called The Green Hornet Hive you pillick so what do you reckon he is going to write about.Why don't you get 2 Blue Legend ( very quite lately ) or Blue Boy to set up their own sites or stop your incessant whinging.

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  5. Well done Carlton on electing yourselves as heroes and worthy of awards. Just a shame the rest of the town dont agree with you otherwise it would all be valid. But its not.

    Funny how three teams shared the best player award and MC werent included.

    Credit where it is due.

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  6. i'll give Green Hornet an award.

    He works so hard at it and we dont acknowledge it nearly enough.

    "Has been" of the year.

    well done champ. Now go celebrate with a wank over redtube whilst you write your next blog.

    from the NHRU

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  7. Anon, i didn't know this site was officialy recognised by the NHRU & the awards were valid. It's a piss take so take it for what it is, if you wan't to read someone fawning over your beloved Poons just go on the Herald website anytime & read Gardners one eyed views that we have all put up with for years, valid or otherwise.

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  8. NHRU - Piss funny comment, but u forgot to mention that the hornet would be most likely to RIP A HUGE BONG before his wankfest.

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  9. So much envy, it's all GREEN!

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  10. nhru...you must be old !!!

    no one wanks over redtube any more!!

    try

    tommys-bookmarks.com/
    pornhub.com
    tube8.com
    xtube.com

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  11. Anon, Pull you head out your asshole and have a look around you no one likes the poons it has been like that for as long as i can remember merewether a second in these stakes but the poons take the trophy when it comes to COCK SHOWS

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  12. Such an informative site, thank you "i'd rather" for the community service to porn, shall be looking them up.

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  13. "most intimidating and stupid"-thats pure gold!! I do also hope kurt banks award was a pisstake!? 1000 5th grade GFs dont make up for a premier 1 GF appearance let alone a win which the rat has never and will never have!! (Renee Cross)-that is a bit harsh! I dont like the man but thats not very nice to her or him!
    I hope simes doesnt go to uni as this man (apart from the wanker oinker)is the most hated at the moment! Tommy Shannon probably shouldve won the anderson outright!!

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  14. How does Kevill win the award when he was charged with assault last year and has been blacked banned from from playing rep footy for the NHRU because of his behavior on tour? Mark Taufua had all his points stripped in 05 after being charged with assault. Another example of double standards by the NHRU board.

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  15. Apparently according to hornet on earlier blogs they "changed" the rules after Mark was stripped and Kramer won by default! Funny how the NHRU bends the rules when it suits-same as it did when they booted easts!

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  16. they are always changing the rules to spite you carlton wankers. Good to see you are awake to it Lesbot.

    everybody enjoys watching carlton lose (cant imagine why they are such good blokes !)

    try eating worms

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  17. Ahhh Lesbot ur back. Cth grade 1st grade at the end of the day its only Newcastle rugby mate...nothing real special, played cos you like playing. No i wasnt lucky enough to win a 1st grade gf, like alot of other players, and ones alot more deserving. But who cares the following year anyways.Its about time you let go of your hatred cos no one cares bout that either as hatred usually comes from jealously, so either put your name to it or F#ckup and start talkin bout rugby you bravado keyboard writer.

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  18. "Credit where it is due." - Annon if you had of read the whole article the hornet gave credit where it was due to the awards night and the nhru. He even said Shannon should of won it outright. Its clear hes taking the piss but how the guy from singo got points when they lost by an average of 30 points beats me. I think he even gave credit to beaches, wanderers as well.

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  19. Anon, you never make to much sense do you, just slow down a bit, think about what you want to say then type it in, go over it & send if it makes sense.I would have thought it was to 'suit' the Carlton wankers not 'spite'Are you sure you are a dreaded gay poon cause you sure didn't go to a private school, maybe just one of their hangers on, isn't that a big wrap.

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  20. Even as a non-carlton rugby supporter, I enjoy the Green Hornets ones sided tongue in cheek rants... but some of you blokes commenting on here really need to wake up to yourselves, personal attacks on players from other clubs? Really? remember this is only amateur rugby and these blokes are out there playing for the love of the game... I would love to see some of the blokes on this site go up to Dan Kevill or Bubba and tell them what they think of them rather than commenting anonymously on the Hornets site...

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  21. "hatred usually comes from jealousy", you're so noble Kurt. You should read yours and stockys prior blogs before getting so poetic! I dont hate any1. I am content behind the keyboard chalky as i (like many on here) have probably seen you bashed (both on and off the field) enough times!
    PS: why do you want my name, you had me pegged as shooter didnt you!

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  22. (INHALE) Howabout you all grow up and if you are going to make a personal insult...use your real name. Also using someones name (Renee Cross) not related to the column is not cool......(EXHALE...COUGH...COUGH). Thanks for the tip 'I'd rather be watching this, than the poons', I'll check that out before I pack the next one.

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  23. I was surpised to hear thecket didn't get coach of the year. Taking a team from 7th to 1st is pretty impressive as is having 6 teams in the GF's. Sth Beaches coach should have got most improved.

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  24. So, let me get this right.....the Hornet is a "has been", "wanker" and likely to "rip a huge bong" before he wanks. Why then, do you take the time to read, digest and respond to his opinions and observations? As for getting stoned before a wank, isn't that his personal choice?

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  25. Leroy from Albany CreekSeptember 15, 2009 at 7:33 PM

    Well said Pantsman, Renee has done nothing to deserve the insults levelled at her and well addressed Plant. Keep the blog as its meant to be, a good laugh. As for awards I didn't see Wayne Baggs get a mention in least improved coach nominations.

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  26. Please don't take my comment about Dan Kevill to be aimed at him, I have known him for a while and do like the guy. I think he is a great footballer and deserved his award and I did congratulate him at the awards night. My issue lies with the NHRU, what Kevi does in his own time is his business as should have been the case with Taufua, this is not pro footy and I don't believe the NHRU have the right to omit a player on incidents that happen outside of footy. I only commented anonymously because I didn't know how to get my screen name on there, and by the way I am not the same anonymous that always comments and winges and bitches about everyone.

    Punchy

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  27. Will the green hornet have enough sting for 6 victories on Saturday. Uni in Colts, Bambach to shine, Catholics in 2's, no Nolan no chance

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  28. Lets look at the awards objectively...Everyone knows that Kevill is the best player in the comp handsdown the singo bloke is a fair dinkum pretender...Bias aside you can't claim to know much about rugby if you wouldn't say he is the most influential player of any club...he is also sydney first grade stand with the only thing to hold him back being his discipline...im sure if the coaches and player votes kevill would come out on top with creighton and strachan going close as well...merewether by 4 in the decider

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  29. GO THE BROWNSNAKES!!!

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  30. have the brownsnakes brought a scrum? seems to be there achillies heal each finals campaign as all season the "non contested" gets em thru i hear...

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  31. it is the smallest and probably most ineffective scrum in the NHRU without a doubt but this year i don't think a srum has gone uncontested.

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  32. Excellent.....now we have brownsnakes on this site. They have called their share of uncontested scrums but even so they still have the best side in c grade, and for a small scrum they served us up a treat in the major semi....and then they bring on the big blonde headed leaguie. But funny things happen in G.F's like we saw last year. But are the teams that should be there this yr. Good Luck all.

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  33. when the mighty blues win....

    i will run across the field with a tee-shirt i have produced.

    it has the identity of the green hornet and a picture of his ugly mug !!

    i will only do this if the two blues win though...

    look out for me !!!

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  34. Should be a cracker of a GF Kurt, Dolf lungdren will be making his usual appearance in the snake team.

    Hopefully another game that will come down to the wire!!

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  35. spoiling ther party: no one really cares about your t-shirt as the green hornet isn't a person. hes a way of life. Your probably wrong anyway.

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  36. haha. I'd love for you to do that. Then I can rubbish you every day on this site for the next ten years, as I'll know who you are too. By wearing the shirt you are essentially agreeing that I can make up satirical commentry about you, no matter how slanderous or untrue it actually is.

    Can I also get a copy of the shirt? If not, I'll sign yours for you, and you can pose for a photo with me in front of all the fans on green hill. Bring a beer too.

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  37. *no chance i am wrong
    *i won't do it unless the blues win
    *i think a lot of people will be interested to know who it is
    *i spoke with the hornet at the nhru awards

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  38. Stop it, don't out the Hornet i have personally seen him make grown men from north of Maitland reduced to tears, imagine what he would do to a poor defenceless boy from the Blue Oyster Bar? MAKES ME SHUDDER .

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  39. My tips for the matches this weekend...

    5th grade - Brownsnakes by 10 (if their scrum holds up
    4th grade - Merewether by 15 (as long as they hook Tim Woolf early and give the ball to his brother often)
    3rd grade - Pokolbin by 7 (Kermode to steer them to victory)
    Colts - Merewether by 20 (too good for ill disciplined Uni. Chayce Bamback is the most over rated player in Newcastle)
    2nd grade - Hamilton by 10 (look out for a number of Hamos first grade starters from last week dropping back to their 2nd grade grand final team).
    1st grade - Wanderers by 1 (have been the best team all year despite not having the depth of Merewether. The loss of Sherwood is far bigger than Bertsos for the Greens, however once they get going Kevill and Aston will be hard to stop. Can Merewether's young backline handle the heat???)

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  40. Weekends tips...i agree with most tips as winners but your margins are way off...
    cths, snakes by 4 on the bell as usual.
    4ths a draw
    3rds by a tyrell try on the 60th min
    mcrc in a faggot walk off...
    2nds to slime as last yr cos the best non picked 1st grader is playin for them
    1st grade......who cares, most r already drunk., but sos by a try, an assist and a chip thro for his boyfriend. so slime by 15 cos gilmour cant kick!!!!

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  41. I've been reluctant to comment before as i'm aware that this forum is just a big wank for the pompous carlton no-hopers. But to accuse that the seahorse colts are to 'ill-disciplined' to take the premiership is rubbish. As this team is the same one to dismiss the arrogant carlton colts before the brawl. And to labell the whole team as 'ill-disciplined' when the cause of the problem was the remaining easts colts that waltzed into the club thinking they owned it.

    Also theres no way wanderers will win in 1's with current form. But look out for an angry angry little simes.

    Regards,
    The Angry Seahorse

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