So you've found your way to the Hornet Hive. My number one fan Neil and Bob, better known as Bill and Ted on the much heralded Newcastle Herald comments site has encouraged me to create an original forum with original thoughts. Thanks for the encouragement, however I don't want to play sleep overs and pretend I am the old nurse from All Saints.A question I have been frequently asked is who is the Green Hornet? Unbeknownst to me Britt Reid was the original Hornet, and he was a long distant cousin or nephew of the the Lone Ranger. The Lone Ranger was from Texas so I'm guessing he was tightly related in any case.
I was actually named as a tribute to iconic newcastle pop band 'Little Hornet,' who were favourites of mine from the days when The Castle and Fannys night clubs were in and skinny leg jeans and Alcopops were out.
Anyway, my identity for everyone to know is not actually tied up with Newcastle Rugby. I'll leave the tying up to Kenton Foole, whom I'm told models his leadership on Bernie Eccelsten, the F1 leader of the world. I do follow the local competition closely and am impressed with the support it has. If I was to hand out encouragement awards to its supporters, you'd all get one. I do support Merewether Carlton though and believe that a club is a family, not a fly by nighter with 2 teams, or definately not a team who poaches players with White goods, a university education, or the chance to wear blue and get all George Michael in the oyster bar.
I am also against everything the NHRU is doing to the local game. They have no idea on growth of Rugby in the area, and its the rubbish clubs like Beaches, Lake Mac, Waratah, Griffins that are holding the area back in its development. It saddens me that I have had to turn to supporting the local Ice Hockey team the North Stars, or even the Jets(once they sign gary wilson from edgeworth.) I am also trying to get labor kicked out of Newcastle as being a Rugby fan entitles me to vote liberal.
Feel free to make some ridiculous comments on this page which for the moment will be uncensored, unlike my fairfaxed counterpart. Lets keep the swearing to a minimum though as my 5 year old can actually read, unlike the majority of 25 year olds from Singleton who were schooled from home on farms
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This guy is a jerk
ReplyDeleteIt gives you something better to do than sit at home at jerk off to internet smut. Jerker. Your probably related to jerk sargent.
ReplyDeletehawks to beat slime with a bonus point this weekend
ReplyDeletehawks have about as much hope of getting a bonus point as your south african friend has playing for Newcastle let aolne his province, let alone his country.
ReplyDeleteGlad that our onimous remarks on the herald are the catalyst for this blog spot. A small request- that it is an easts free zone and that 2 blues are encouraged to comment but by no means will comments be respected simply because they are 2 blues.
ReplyDeleteRegards,
Neil, Bob, Bill and Ted.
Anyone is available to comment. I had to make a personal call the bloghost to make sure those from sherwood forest, - 'the merry men' were allowed on such a hetro forum.
ReplyDeletethat should be ominous,
ReplyDeleteN,B,B and T.
dyslexia is a disability like all the others.
ReplyDeleteHornet i hope you aren't going to censor this column like our friend little Jimmy does on the Herald site, i'm sure everyone's best work ends up in cyberspace there.Can we talk about Brisbane Water if we can't talk about the Smog Gobblers?
ReplyDeleteAt present the censorship function has been disabled. Keep naughty words to a minimum as my 5yo will read them and take them to school.
ReplyDeletesorry hornet but the hwkys will agin return the slime to the losers pile after this weekend, we are building momentum in every grade, baring 3rds so we dropped our real third grade players to 4th grade so we can win another grade this season. we have more depth than the indian ocean and more skill than the ladies at a korean car wash... hawks to soar in 2009
ReplyDeleteGreen hornet I’m all for this site, It makes my day when I log onto the hive and you get some cock show from the hawks that thinks they have a chance of winning on Saturday. This is what the herald needed somewhere you can voice your opinion without it being censored long live the hornet
ReplyDeleteNHRU SHOULD change the comp in the following way: (particularly if they have the power to boot a proud club like easts then they must have the balls to do the following)
ReplyDelete1. Force Mergers:
Lake Macq + Southern Lakes
Nelson Bay + Medowie
Waratah + Griffins
or have East resurgent inclusive of griffins as it might aid there inclusion claims having 4 grades plus colts.
green hornet makes me physical ill but i like throwing up.poons not welcome
ReplyDeleteeveryone is welcome chink ita, except maybe referees.
ReplyDeleteI believe the NHRU should look at an educational program for the hawks.
ReplyDeleteThe spelling, punctuation and grammer you have displayed thus far is atrocious.
to save you looking it up cross fit, atrocious doesn't mean good.
Obviously a uni grub "here to help" sorry that my "grammer" is not up to your lofty standards, but if your going to try and correct someone be sure that you know what your on about as its not my 'grammer' which was lacking, but my "GRAMMAR".
ReplyDeletePerhaps you should "look it up" and help yourself instead.
Hornet, I'd be interested in your thoughts and opinions on the news story of the week. sydney to gosford via brisbane.
ReplyDeletehere to help...........crossfithawk got you there!
ReplyDeleteAt least this site will hopefully keep this mutt off the herald forum. We all know you're kurt banks and all know what type of person you are in real life!! You are a rat in all aspects of life, from your failed rugby choices to your failed relationships with dike female football players. Choke on it you little turd!
ReplyDeleteI hate Kurt hornet banks: Wrong there buddy. I too hate Kurt Banks. He's right up there with ben finnie, John hall, Lee Martin, Jamie lind and Gareth Wasik.
ReplyDeletei put gareth wasik as king grub
ReplyDeletedid you see the stocky little jockey who won the first at muswellbrook on the weekend... wore green, last name was definately hornet....
ReplyDeleteHornet,congratulations on the blog,however as far as insightful,succinct comment,humour and sarcasm go I am afraid you still lag well behind Wayne of Windale and Peeledseal.Sure you have the popularity and following,but this just reminds me of the times long ago when after being persuaded by a 16 year old salesboy my father purchased a Betamax video rather than the more accepted VHS.As my siblings and I debated which of the three videos available in the Beta section to hire for the 20th time and looked over at the endless rows of movie variety in the VHS section those words replayed themselves in my head "The system is superior with better technology and clearer picture quality".I have used this edict and character building episode throughout all facets of my life and find that your situation fits this rule.If I want a quick fix or some cheap entertainment I look for the Hornet,however if I really want to know a subject inside out and get some true perspective I look to Wayne or the Seal(or one of his/her many alter egos).
ReplyDeleteAlso I notice from your blog that you are 43 with a five year old larva,now I am assuming he is your eldest,as from experience your requests to tone down any swearing on your site would be pointless if he had any older brothers or sisters.Anyway my point is it has certainly taken you some time to nail that elusive Queen hornet.Given your age I might put this down to your time at Carlton when players of your vintage like Shawry,Ed Charters,Jimmy Tiveous,er..Tivius and Martin Swan use to love a homo erotic adventure or two.I can only assume you spent a little more time than them in this "experimental" stage.
Also on a completely unrelated topic I saw another blast from the past when checking out the swell at Southy the other day.I ran into the long thought dead Ben Ryan.Now for those of you who don't know,Ben was a leading star for Wanderers in the early 90's.He was also probably one of only a handfull of players you could honestly say did not belong at Wanderers(although Graham Thompson is a top bloke and great footballer I refuse to count him in this group as he shares DNA with Aaron,the biggest whinger/cockhead to play in the NHRU).Suffice to say Ben had some brushes with the law,had a large marijuana leave tattooed on his side and certainly didn't appear in the control group given placebos when studying the effects of drugs on the human body.Anyway while the meeting was fleeting he did seem coherent and healthy,however I will withold my results for the mentioned study until I can assess Tim Adcock or half of The Mayfield East club(including coaches)from the said era.
Anyway thanks for the effort I'm going back to the Herald forum to continue my count of the chins on that picture of Nigel.
Masonite Moose sorry to say you are definately a long way off. WOW has my respect, even though sometimes our eyes are unmatched. Pedestrian is probably the worst contributer to the forum after 2blue legend, sorry mate.
ReplyDeleteAlso, can you keep the comments to a few lines as it would break up the page from this nonsensical drival.
ReplyDeleteHornet I think that you will find the word you are looking for is DRIVEL and the only drivel is the article on Jayson Strachan.Even in satire you would expect an "interview" to contain more than three quotes from the subject.
ReplyDeleteYou said comments on this site would be uncensored,then you tell the first person to question your sexuality to keep their comments to a few lines.That is a form of censorship.Has the power gone to your head already or did those homoerotic adventures leave a bad taste in your mouth(pun intended).
ReplyDeleteGreen Hornet I'm sorry to say this site is quite a disappointment.Successful comedy and satirical humour can be quite a hard gig.Just like Jason Hoffman thinking he is capable of playing in the Bundesliga because he has scored two goals in twenty five appearances,I fear you may be a bit ahead of yourself.Even though Neil and Bob suggested you start a Blog I think even you would agree that you need more material than a repetitive joke about Gary Wilson joining the Jets staff,changing a blokes nickname from Bubba to Blubba and some in jokes that only the elite slime crowd find humorous as they run laps of Townson.
ReplyDeleteHarsh But Fair is right,one swallow does not make a summer,it might make a homoerotic adventure though.But you'd know more about that than me apparently Green Hornet.
ReplyDeleteMasonite Moose sounds like you've been drinking too much of that well known local ale Merewether Bitter.
ReplyDeleteWhy do pelicans carry the fish they catch in their beaks?
ReplyDeleteBecause they haven't got any pockets.
If this is the case and thats all you've got pelican boy, better go buy some pelican pants with pockets pretty deep. Deeper than your gag reflexing throat you posess because that was as bad as HBF throwing my own jokes back to me.
I was fortunate enough to miss the connotations of homo erotic nature by the moose, but if a 16 year old salesman selling his dad a beta video player counts as gay fantasy, I get it now. really glad you guys found the time to give me some feedback.
Slartibartfast: I was unaware of the journalistic code you mentioned. I chose to leave university as I found it restrictive in founding my own opinions and views. Strucure is a view, generally reserved for communists so these comments would no doubt have had you blacklisted if you were around in the 60's. This would have been ironic as blacklisting is not very democratic.We can discuss these views on Politics Tuesday.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately the mentioned article is 100% accurate and not intended to be satirical at all. i did neglect to leave out the fact Jayson said that Tom S. has never been able to pass from the ground like him, and his dad coincidentally ran for the greens party in his political days.
I am interested in your thoughts and wisdom on this issue that grinds my gears! In 2005 the NHRU wrongly denied Mark Tafua the Anderson medal due to the assault charge he had at the time. They also (unsuccessfully) tried to ban him from playing in the GF that year. Fast track 4 years and we have Mr Dan Kevil, heading the list for the medal and possibly destined for the GF (hope not!). (Besides the fact he is a speed freak) he too has recently received an assault charge but this has not stopped his chances of getting the medal. He has also been supended. Where is the NHRU on this one! I know you are anti Waratah but there is obviously a more important issue here. And that is the NHRUs ability to apply rules and criteria when they see fit and for their own agendas! In 2005 it was either an agenda they had with mark, the club or a combination of both! Same as them kicking Easts out. Again applying their new "rules" to get rid of them for their own reasons.
ReplyDeleteIf Dan Kevil receives the Anderson Medal this year (regardless of deserving it or not) it will be the biggest hipocracy in the NHRU. I think the double standard is disgusting. Someone needs to have a serious look at who is running this show, cos there is obviously some puppets with their hands fair up the asses of those involved!
I was of the belief the NHRU changed the loophole after Jamie lind won the medal by default. If they didn't its definately a case of double standards, even though mr. kevil is apparently quite a quick runner or freak as you would describe him. I also believe Tafua was actually due to be in prison the day the GF was played and Waratah sought a "special" release. Whitegoods went a long way back then. I'm also unsure if mr. Kevil has been found guilty of anything yet? As for making the GF, Wanderers have as much chance as Waratah.
ReplyDeleteThe same year Tafua was disqualified from winning the Anderson Medal,Jack Norton wrongly won the Colts medal.He had been suspended earlier in the year for petulance when he walked out on the Colts rep team because the coach worked out he was rubbish and couldn't tackle but he refused to play off the bench so he quit(bit like last year when Martin Delore spat it and quit the rep team because that Easts kid got in ahead of him)and the coach then got him suspended,but he still won the medal.Also Tafua swapped his weekend detention for weekdays to enable him to play the GF.
ReplyDeleteIt has also been brought to my attention that tafua, 3 years earlier was suspended from playing for Waratah forever after walking out on them semi final time to play League for Clarence Town. I guess it is really a fickle club.
ReplyDeleteTafua was never suspended from Waratah for life.Tonga Tuae and him were suspended by the NHRU for 6 months and Tonga only was told he wasn't welcome back at Waratah as they knew they would want Mark again when they could afford him.They both went back to Easts who appealed and got them cleared.
ReplyDeleteHornet you are sounding like a Bolton St Cowbow with your legal advice there, maybe you can help out a former mungo who exposed himself a la a former Manly player ( this guy may actualy have played for them ) in the Singo sheds last week when there was actually a touching family portrait going on in the foreground. Once a grub allways a grub, a low point for the Slime, probably on you tube somewhere with Bertsos & Garner photos!
ReplyDeleteplumber, you tube is for videos I'm surprised you were able to turn on the computer. I bet you still use copper and not plastics too.....
ReplyDeleteHello old chaps. Viscount Wilberforce Bentbottom back home after an absence prompted by a misunderstandiong with one or two of the lads in the school second XV. Caught up with Jeremy Longhorn the other day. My God he knows how to put away a G and T. Speaking of which '...pass me another G and T Jimmy and sit beside me on the sofa'.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, Horny says to me '...Botts, how do you read the tactics this week between the Greens and the Hawks?'
'Well Horny, this is what the Greens will do. They'll attack the lineout because O'Brien won't be there to hold Palmer's hand.
They'll limit kicking in open play because they fear the Hawk's counterattack.
They're play will be directed to either wing because the 2 Hawk wingers are playing out of position and can't read the defence.
The Greens will be happy to meet the Hawks at set pieces because the Hawks have the most one-dimentional attack in the comp.'
'But what about the Hawks?'
'Ah, Horny, this is the beautiful part. Every Monday afternoon Blubba buys a 1.25l bottle of Creaming Soda. His housemate, Travesty of Justice, buys a 200g pack of Smiths Chicken chips and a half kilo of little boys topped with a liberal coating of Fountain tomato sauce. They watch the same replay week in week out of the Wildfires beating Eastwood at St John oval.
So when the Market Gardener rings for a comment Blubba can honestly say 'I've watched the DVD and I have a plan'...at which point the masses 'being a Catholic club' cry out as one 'He has a plan! the Messiah has spoken!Show us a miracle!'And he does.He unclips the brackets holding the top of his skull in place, lifts the lid and says 'Look, its a no-brainer'. And it is true. He is a living, walking, talking miracle without a brain. So every time someone asks him what his plans are and he says 'It's a no-brainer' he is telling the absolute gospel truth.
'Another G and T please Jimmy and wipe the lipstick off your glass.'
hate Kurt hornet Banks said...
ReplyDeleteAt least this site will hopefully keep this mutt off the herald forum. We all know you're kurt banks and all know what type of person you are in real life!! You are a rat in all aspects of life, from your failed rugby choices to your failed relationships with dike female football players. Choke on it you little turd.
And you are????
I can put my name to something i say..Kurt Banks.
No your name is Kurt Plant. Plaaaant
ReplyDeleteMy name is big donger! Jam me fair into your earhole rodent!
ReplyDeleteI wouldnt go all bravo bout putting your name to things chalky as your name doesnt mean much-just ask the hornet!
Rough Gary when are you going to change your name to Gareth Nowbetter.We all no you was sick for years but surely you are cured now.
ReplyDeletefrom all reports rough gary is still sick, but not as bad as his counterpart smooth gary who I hear is weighing in at 45 kg's at the moment.Its pretty 'rough' to make ill of someones sickness, especially to someone who did it tough for quite a few years. I'll pass the message on to him though and maybe he can let you know.
ReplyDeleteHornett, as the herald dont wish to publish our stories online can you give us a hornett semi finals preview ?
ReplyDeleteHornet - how was the cricketers on the nite the two blues took the minor prem. couple of nice g and t's Nice to see a yappy slime getting back to his feminine side
ReplyDelete